Instagram has created some insane self-esteem issues, the need to always be perfect and do better, the obsession with having a cohesive theme and getting a lot of likes, and the reoccurring feeling of self-doubt.
Been there, done that.
It's time to be in control of how we perceive our worth on Instagram.
Stop Doubting Your Worth
How many times have you felt like your photos are complete shit? That so-and-so's are SO GOOD and you just don't know how to get your feed to look as perfect as theirs?
You want perfection so badly but you're never satisfied with your photos because they just aren't good enough. I bet you're thinking to yourself how often you feel this way right about now. Are you? Continue reading.
Own Your Style
We constantly compare ourselves to others, especially to those who are KILLIN' the Instagram game. We see that these certain people have their personal style down, own expensive clothing, get to travel around the world, work with their dream brands, and they have thousands of likes on their photos.
Man, that must feel really good. That must be the life. Why the hell am I not good enough to get all that stuff? Why don't I get a lot of likes? Maybe my photos just actually suck - I mean c'mon, there's no way I could ever create that kind of photo with those clothes in that dream location. Maybe if I bought their presets........
Okay, stop. Just because someone has their personal brand on lock, doesn't mean you're allowed to talk shit about yourself because you don't, or because you're in between styles, or because you don't even know how to create it.
First off, style is not static, and it's only natural for you to keep trying to find your style until you nail it and know it. Secondly, just because your style isn't similar to your idol's, doesn't mean yours isn't worth praise.
But that praise must come from you first.
Style is utterly unique and you should embrace what you have to offer. Don't worry about looking like all the other Instagram feeds out there - you shouldn't and you shouldn't settle for that! You don't want to blend in! And while you're out there, standing out and being true to you, remind yourself how lovely and refreshing you are in a social media app that strives to be like everyone else.
Own your style, love your style, and don't ever think it's not good enough.
Stop Giving a Shit About The Number of Likes
How do most people measure their worth on Instagram? Likes and engagement. But mostly likes.
Why? Because it gives us a statistic and boy, do we love measuring our worth in numbers. That way, we can compare those numbers to our other numbers on our other photos and of other people's photos. You know, to see how we are doing.
But here's the thing - the number of likes you get on a photo doesn't determine your worth. Yes, it allows you to know if 1) your content is being liked by your audience and 2) if it's even being shown to your audience (more on this in a second) but it doesn't determine your worth.
Let's take two scenarios.
You just posted a *fuego* photo of yourself and it got the most likes you've ever received on a photo to date. Damn, that feels good, doesn't it? Gives ya a little ego boost and slaps you with a smile, doesn't it? Yes! And it feels AMAZING! And you say to yourself, "Hell yeah, I'm killin' it, look at me SLAYYY THE 'GRAM!"
Now, you just posted another photo of yourself, which is equally as fuego as the last, but it received nearly half the likes as your first. And this makes you feel like you did something wrong, that this photo isn't good enough or good at all anymore - that you aren't good enough. You start doubting yourself.
And this is what's really important, so read carefully.
Do you remember the moment you laid eyes on that second photo, in a sea of photos from that photoshoot? Do you remember the moment your eyes landed on that photo and you excitedly said YES! That's the one!? Do you remember how you felt?
You felt amazing. You had full-blown confidence in yourself, your looks, your vibe - everything. You couldn't wait to edit that photo and pop it on Instagram.
But you didn't get the likes you were hoping you'd get. And you allowed yourself to let that number dictate how you should feel about yourself. Why would you do that to yourself?
Just a few hours ago, you loved that photo! LOVED IT! It was so trendy, true to your aesthetic, and by far, the best photo you'd ever taken. Allowing yourself to give in to the idea that likes determine your worth would only be a disservice to you. You knew your worth before you posted the photo, so why allow that worth to be taken away after it's posted?
As a side note, because I said I would speak about it a little, I wanted to touch on what I said about if your photo is even being shown to your audience or not. I have a business Instagram account so I get to see the analytics of my photos, one of them being how many people it was shown to, called Reach.
Instagram does this thing in which it likes to think it knows you. It shows you photos it thinks you'll like best, based on whose photos you like and comment on. It's a domino effect, actually, because once you start engaging with a certain profile, Instagram will continue to make sure they show you that profile, instead of someone else who you don't engage with as regularly. But how can you engage with other profiles if you don't see them on your feed? You can't possibly remember the 800+ people you follow and their handles. So with that, Instagram keeps the profiles you engage with on your feed, while the others are getting lost because *you* don't engage with them for *some mysterious reason*.
On the other side of this, you must realize that this is what is happening to your followers. They don't always see your post because Instagram has great power over what is being shown to them. It's not that they don't like their photo, in fact, half of them probably never even saw it in the first place! So, see? You can't blame your worth on likes when neither you nor your followers have much power.
It's hard not to get discouraged on Instagram. It's actually so incredibly easy to get discouraged. All we are wanting is to grow, be better, and do better and sometimes we feel like all the odds are against us.
Have the Courage to Shift Your Mindset
As humans, we are creatures of habit. And in our twenties and beyond, we're either so incredible stuck being indecisive or so incredibly adamant about the way we think and perceive things.
It's time to start forming a new habit in your mind.
If you're an indecisive person, it's time to have more confidence in yourself and take control of your decisions. If you're the opposite, it's time to shift your perspective.
When you are faced with a situation that would normally make you feel discouraged, the first step is to realize that this feeling is about to happen rather than completely allowing it to. How? It's that split second you realize you're dissatisfied right before you start getting down on yourself.
The moment that split second happens, that's where you need to take control.
Tell yourself, "This is when I would normally get discouraged. But I'm deciding that I'm not going to allow myself to. All it will do is bring me down and I don't want to feel down. This won't allow me to grow or move forward. Instead, I will dwell on this if I give in to discouragement. I can't allow this to get in my way.....this isn't worth my time."
This is the point when you should start reminding yourself of your worth, too, to further help you not drown in potential discouragement.
Simply Put, You Control What You Attract
I could write a whole blog post about this regarding life in general, but we're talking about Instagram right now.
So, let's talk about the way you think about things. It's really hard to control the way you think about things especially if it's not how you normally think about things (duh.)
What you choose to invest your thoughts and energy into is what you will get. Unfortunately, it's that simple. So the moment you are faced with a situation in which you'd normally feel discouraged (barely any likes, no DMs, lots of unfollows, etc.), if you choose to let whatever it is upset you, you will be discouraged and feel like shit. If you choose to let it slide and carry on with your day unbothered, because you are confident and you know your worth, then you won't allow the chance of discouragement to step in your way.
Are you like me who used to always say how you wear your heart on your sleeve, you can't ignore your emotions, you have to reallllly feeeellll them? If so, I want you to know that this isn't an act of repressing your feelings. It's an act of controlling how you react to certain situations and deciding if it's worth your time to allow yourself to feel badly about this specific situation.
One thing I often learn about a lot of people who get extremely discouraged and doubtful regarding Instagram is that deep down, they have low self-esteem. They aren't 100% confident in themselves - how they look, how they think, their decisions/choices, etc. And with that, they can't confidently say that they love themselves without hesitation or have some kind of excuse attached or a "but..." attached.
Cut that out right now. That's a demand.
Plus, the longer it takes you to form the habit of self-love, the longer it takes for you to achieve inner peace (not to mention stronger relationships, a healthier lifestyle, etc.)
When you practice self-love, you exercise your ability to not allow anything external to get in the way of your happiness, satisfaction, and good energy. How? Because you believe in yourself. You have confidence in yourself. You don't have time to waste dwelling on things as minuscule as a couple of unfollows or fewer likes on a photo.
When you love yourself, you allow more positivity into your life. It's like a bonus perk that just comes naturally to you - you don't have to fight for it (how great is that?!)
It's kind of really bizarre that when I start letting go of doubt and discouragement regarding Instagram, I feel like I begin making major moves forward. I feel like all of a sudden, I'm getting a lot of DMs, I'm getting more likes and comments, more followers, and more collaboration inquiries.
The moment you let go of negative energy, you make so much more room for opportunity and growth.
And you owe that to yourself.
One Last Thing
I wanted to leave you guys with some final words. Before I do, I want to say that I hope you enjoyed this blog post and that you found it valuable. I've had my fair share of self-doubt when it comes to Instagram and what I do on the app, but it's possible to see past your doubts, have killer confidence and love yourself endlessly. I'm talking from first-hand experience. I'm ~credibleeeeee~ okay?!
My Final Words to You
You are worth more than the number of likes on your Instagram photo.
You are unique, creative, and have so much potential. You will succeed.
You have the ability to control how you perceive situations and how you react to situations.
You deserve to love yourself and be proud of yourself and think highly of yourself.
You're killing it.
Pin it to Pinterest!
What are you proud of regarding your Instagram?
What will you do to get over your self-doubt?
What will you do to ensure that you remain strong and confident throughout your Instagram journey?
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